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Self-Driving Cars – Why They Don’t Move Me

Picture+of+the+silly+Waymo+found+at%3A+http%3A%2F%2Fwww.techtimes.com%2Farticles%2F27236%2F20150119%2Fgoogle-pushing-for-driverless-cars-in-the-market-by-2020.htmhttp%3A%2F%2Fwww.techtimes.com%2Farticles%2F27236%2F20150119%2Fgoogle-pushing-for-driverless-cars-in-the-market-by-2020.htm.+Thanks+for+making+my+article+NOT+eye-candy.+xoxo
Picture of the silly Waymo found at: http://www.techtimes.com/articles/27236/20150119/google-pushing-for-driverless-cars-in-the-market-by-2020.htmhttp://www.techtimes.com/articles/27236/20150119/google-pushing-for-driverless-cars-in-the-market-by-2020.htm. Thanks for making my article NOT eye-candy. xoxo

Picture of the silly Waymo found at: http://www.techtimes.com/articles/27236/20150119/google-pushing-for-driverless-cars-in-the-market-by-2020.htmhttp://www.techtimes.com/articles/27236/20150119/google-pushing-for-driverless-cars-in-the-market-by-2020.htm. Thanks for making my article NOT eye-candy. xoxo

Picture of the silly Waymo found at: http://www.techtimes.com/articles/27236/20150119/google-pushing-for-driverless-cars-in-the-market-by-2020.htmhttp://www.techtimes.com/articles/27236/20150119/google-pushing-for-driverless-cars-in-the-market-by-2020.htm. Thanks for making my article NOT eye-candy. xoxo

Zain Ashraf, Soon to be Editor but Staffer at the moment

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Disclaimer: I am a massive car guy and this is my extremely biased opinion so if you want information, go somewhere else. If you want a strong opinion read this.

 

Self driving cars are coming. There’s no getting away from that. Unless you can run faster than the car’s top speed. But, sadly, most people cannot run faster than 25 miles per hour, which is the Google Autonomous car’s top speed. So, either you take control, which is always fun, and go quick- or, don’t take control, and go slow. You might know which one I’d take. I’ll let you guess, and I won’t tell you that I think the latter idea is worse that trying on 76 pairs of pants. You should get the idea now. I think self driving cars have many problems.

 

The first is a philosophical problem. A self-driving car is programmed to save YOU in a crash- or is it? Suppose this: you are driving at 100 miles per hour (which means you are not in the Google car.) The semi truck carrying oil (which you will not need, because your autonomous machine will undoubtedly be electric) in front of you suddenly stops. You can crash, and die, or you can veer into a school bus full of children. What does the car do? It cannot brake in time- it is going too fast. It might think that there is one of you in the vehicle and more than one child in the bus. The point is this- how do we know what the self-driving car is thinking? How do we know what the self-driving car knows. How do we know it’s morales? You see, we don’t. And if the makers of these ‘cars of the future’ put all of that as well as the specs on the window sticker, the window sticker would have to be as the as the windshield itself. Or would it even have a windshield? I mean, you wouldn’t have to look anywhere? Why not just put a TV for the couch potatoes that we are all becoming?

 

The second problem is for the health of humans. Most humans like to have some sort of control or at least do something. The autonomous car does not let you do that. Electronics are controlling the car, not you. You are just a useless piece of meat that is going along with the ride. Also, I have learned that autonomous cars lose signal if the go into tunnels in mountains. That’s ought to be scary. Unless you are the couch potato that I talked about earlier. Then you are just watching a suspenseful moment in your crime drama film. Humans could get bored in these self-driving cars! The interior of the Google car might be a bit blue, but it is incredibly boring. Also, have you seen the outside of that thing? It looks like a bug. A bug with grey makeup. And I have just learned that it is called the Waymo. So, have a regular car called the Mustang, or have a self driving car recalled the Waymo. And then, if they didn’t before, people would call you a nerd. And what would you think of that? Drive a Mustang, or use a Waymo and lose most of your dignity. Again, the second is probably worse than trying on 76 pairs of pants.
Here’s a thought. What if you are going somewhere, and you decide to stop off, and buy some food. How will you do that? You will probably have to go through some complicated procedure and by the time you are done, you will have passed the area of the restaurant that you worked so hard to code into the in-car GPS, and you will have to do the same procedure over again, only to find that you passed that place too. So, theoretically, unless you eat before the journey or take snacks, you will starve. Which is worse than trying on 76 pairs of pants. Also, what if you are in a car chase? I know this is not very relevant to the normal person, but action movies will still be made 100 years later. How will the bad guy be veering around traffic? How will the good guy follow the bad guy? Google- just stop. You are ruining the future of car chases.

 

There we have it. Everything that self-driving cars have to work on. Though, if everything is fixed, it will just turn into a car. And in the immortal words of James May, “self driving cars have already been invented. It’s called a taxi.”

 

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Self-Driving Cars – Why They Don’t Move Me